Silent Doll
by Yuki Pyon
Summary: With a kiss and a knee to the groin, Utau moves pass what she once knew was love. And somehow, sadly, Ikuto kind of misses it. Ikuto x Utau.


**Yuki:** Dude. After watching episode 59 of Shugo Chara, my love for this pairing just shot up a tenfold. So I wanted to dedicate my time these days into something relating to them, so I'll start a story :) These two are adorable together, regardless if they're siblings. I like Amuto as well, but this pairing just deserved my tears. I cried so much after that episode, you wouldn't even know D:

Btw, am I the only one who likes this pairing? There's not much IkutoxUtau at all. It makes me sad. T-T

_Disclaimer:_ Shugo Chara! belongs to Peach-pit.

**Silent Doll**

UTAU P.O.V.

_No more._

I didn't want it anymore. It was an odd feeling, a strange consciousness that hit me as I looked at my mirrored reflection. There were about five people hovering over me, curling my lashes, dolling up my face, and shouting nonsense comments such as "hurry up" and "stop doing that to her face". Through all the uproar, I tried my hardest to turn my head and look for any sign of navy blue hair. I was a fool. He wouldn't be here.

My manager, who stood behind me watching these annoying makeup artists smack crap on my face, narrowed her eyes.

"Utau-chan, stop moving. You'll get eyeliner all over your cheeks."

"Sorry."

I faced ahead again, my eyes also narrowing. My reflection was starting to get boring to watch. I watched through the mirror as these people, who were complete strangers to me, did whatever they wanted to do to my face. I frowned.

That feeling came back. My eyes shifted away from the mirror and down to the ground. I didn't want to live like this everyday, knowing that he'll never come back to see me again. It was just like him. But that was who I fell in love with. I felt like dimwit. _So your ideal type of guy are jerks_, I kept telling myself.

_No more. _

It should have hit me long ago that he didn't like me, that he's in love with that Amu Hinamori, and that no matter what I did, even if I did save him, he would have never looked at me like he looked at her. Why it only hit me then, I didn't know, but having been away from him for 5 months had just damaged my sanity. I was going to end it. I wanted to be sane again.

My manager tapped me on my shoulder. I turned around and looked at her. It hadn't hit me that those annoying people had completely given me my space and were no where to be seen, but then again I was thinking too much. It hurts to think so much.

I stood up and walked out of the dressing room, towards the back of the stage, and hearing the disorder coming from behind the closed curtain. "Utau, Utau!" they kept cheering. It was great to finally have a stage again. A stage with fans in the audience, supporters back stage, and me up front.

Sanjou-san gave me a small push. "Go!" she whispered.

I smiled.

I walked on that stage with a stupid grin on my face, knowing that he wouldn't be there tonight. He was never there. I didn't expect anything as the curtain opened, the crowd grew louder, and the music started. He wouldn't be standing in the back with his arms folded, staring at the floor and pretending to care. He just wouldn't be there.

And you know what?

I was right.

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Her name was Hoshina Utau. She was a fourteen year old girl and probably the most beautiful fourteen year old you would've ever seen. With a gorgeous mane of sunshine blond hair and the most violet eyes a person could ever have, there was just everything in the world you could have been jealous of. On top of that, she had the dream job of all young people; she was an idol. She was perfect. Every guy wanted her, every girl wanted to be her. You just couldn't imagine being more perfect than that.

But she wanted something that no one would ever know. She wanted her brother, who she had grown deeply attracted to and eventually fell in love with. She would have done anything for him, from the dirtiest to the most sweetest, but he was already in love with another. He never gave her a second look, nor a first look for that matter. It hurt her completely.

She has matured, however. She had finally decided to move on. And this was exactly how she did it.

After her concert on Christmas eve, she quickly ran out of the concert hall with her manager screaming frantically at her to get back and change into her warmer clothes. But in her skin tight mini dress that showed almost every single part of her body besides her vaginal area, her buttocks, and part of her bosom, she ran as quickly as her 5 inch high heels would allow her.

And this is where we'll start.

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Utau P.O.V.

I didn't know where I was going. I didn't care what my legs were doing, I just needed to find him.

I was freezing. But I knew I wouldn't have had time to change. Sanjou-san would have made me stay back and talk about absolutely nothing to her as we waited for the audience to leave. Not tonight. I was desperately trying to end it as soon as I could. Talking about absolutely nothing could wait.

There was a part of me that thought, _"If he hasn't shown up for 5 months, then why would I expect to all of a sudden find him tonight?"_ But there was no time to think. Thinking was dangerous, and I kind of needed to actually be alive in order to confront him. I kept on listening for any sound that could possibly indicate his presence, but I started to grow tired and my body was becoming numb due to the cold. I could hear myself breathe wildly, my breath fogging up in front of me, but I kept going.

It was then I heard a melancholic melody, haunting yet comforting, and I couldn't mistake it for any other sound in the world. My legs stopped, my breathing stopped. It was the sound of a violin. Breathing heavily, I turned towards my left, and no doubt, I saw him. Standing on top of the fountain near the park, there he stood with his eyes closed, sadly playing that instrument I had grown to love so much.

At times like these, when I haven't seen him in a while and happen to randomly spot him, I would run to him and hug him and squeal like a sad pathetic fan girl while he annoyingly shrugs me off and keeps walking, but I stood there that night and narrowed my eyes. My breath finally calming down, I took a step towards the fountain, a small 'click' noise coming from the bottom of my heels.

He opened his eyes and stared down at me, but didn't stop playing. His eyes narrowed a bit as I continued to move closer to him, but his hands and fingers still worked his violin as beautifully as he did when he didn't notice my presence. I stared back at him with the same fierceness, never letting that grasp go. It was when I stood directly underneath him that he took his violin from underneath his chin and put them down at his side. We never lost that gaze.

"Oh. It's only you." he said as he stepped down from the fountain. He was in touching reach from me, but I kept my hands to my side clenched tightly. He began to put his instrument in his case, being extremely cautious as he did so.

My voice almost cracked as I responded. "You were expecting Amu."

He stopped. He stared down at his violin, his hands trembling a bit from the cold. His eyebrows furrowed a bit as he hesitated for a second. "Not really." he finally said as he closed his case and latched the latches.

The atmosphere turned terribly awkward and uncomfortable as he flung his case over his shoulder and stared down at me. I tried my best to keep his gaze, but my lip started to quiver and my mind started to fog up. _End it now!_ I kept telling myself. But it wasn't as easy as I put it to be. I still loved him, terribly. It was when he finally said something that I stopped thinking.

"Aren't you cold?" he asked.

"I had a concert tonight."

"You're shaking a lot, Utau."

"Why didn't you come?"

He gave me a confused look, like he didn't understand why I was changing the topic, but my mind was blank and his comments just weren't being processed. The things I kept saying were all a ramble, and I knew I had to keep control of myself for all of this to run smoothly. But his presence was bothering me. It was holding me back. I didn't like it.

He sighed and began to walk off. I snapped my head up and grabbed his hand, shouting "No!" in the process. He turned around and looked down at me, a tad annoyed.

"What do you want?" he asked. His voice wasn't as soft as it was before. I grew terribly afraid as I tried to get the right words out, but I ended up rambling again.

"I love you. A lot." was all I managed. I was still holding onto his hand. My eyes were staring at the floor, and without my consent, it started becoming blurred with tears. I bit my lip and blinked a few times, and was glad that he couldn't see my face.

I heard a sigh. "Utau..." he growled, annoyed. His other hand took my hand off what I was holding onto and walked off again. This time I just stood there, staring at the ground. I gave up. I just couldn't do it. My feelings would always be there, no matter what I did. I felt like a fool.

No.

My head shot up. I wasn't going to keep doing this to myself. If he loved Amu, fine. My feelings will always be there. But I'll learn to move pass it, and if I couldn't, I'll just hide it deeply, even from myself. I came out here in the extreme coldness, dressed in nothing but what could possibly be a toddler's bed sheet, not to be humiliated by him, but to completely draw a conclusion. My legs came alive again. I ran after him.

He wasn't that far away. I was pretty certain that he could hear the 'click clack' of my heels against the ground, but he never turned around.

_I'm almost there._

It was like an everyday thing that I was drawn to him. As he was getting closer and closer to my reach, I grinned a little bit. My heart was about to burst. It was all so near. All this nonsense, this foolish child's play, this terrible ache in myself, it was all about to end in a matter of seconds.

He was right in front of me. He never turned around. My grin grew wider as I reached for his hand.

_No more._

And in that flash of a second, I grabbed his hand, spun him around, pulled him downwards, and kissed him. I couldn't see the expression on his face; my eyes were closed and I was going in deeper. This will be the last time.

And as sudden as the kiss was made, I threw him off of me. I was still tightly grabbing onto his hand. He looked down at me, his eyes wide with confusion, but then narrowed with anger.

"Utau...!"

I smirked. Still tightly holding onto his hand, I looked up at him and said, "Bye-bye."

A knee in the groin.

A sharp cry.

A fall to the floor.

_Who's the idiot now, idiot?_

TBC...

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**Yuki:** Be on the look out for the next chapter, and thanks again :) [ouch to Ikuto, sorry feller]


End file.
